


Joke Smut

by errats



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:06:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27356218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/errats/pseuds/errats
Summary: can't believe alex and I spent time writing this LMAO





	Joke Smut

Another day of this fuckshit, living under the rule of… an outsider. I ground my teeth together slightly, I absolutely couldn't afford to lose focus today. I won't let my people be ruled over by some wannabe prime minister bastard, and I definitely won't ever fucking serve him. 

It's been some days since Maul had taken control of Deathwatch and the entirety of Mandalore. It was a quick and confusing change in power, and many of my comrades were still wary about their new leader. Hell, some were even outright angry and have a whole fucking civil war, what had happened to the whole "No outsider could ever rule Mandalore." sentiment? And yet, they still decided to stay quiet. You thought bitterly, your grip on your blaster carbine tightening. But it doesn't matter if I'm alone. You reminded yourself, intentions clear in your mind. I'll put a swift end to this bullshit.

————

The door to the throne room swung open, y/n thrown unceremoniously towards the foot of the throne. The Zabrak man sitting carelessly upon the intricately carved chair looked down at you, watching you stir from your unconscious state. Gar Saxon and Rook Kast had entered the room after you, followed by other nameless Deathwatch members, weapons drawn and held at the ready.

"This is the insect that caused such trouble?" Maul spoke, his voice steady and dark. "One weak person working alone, and you couldn't kill them?" Saxon and Kast spared a glance at one another.

"I felt it was best that you decide their fate, sir." Saxon replied. "Aside from that, we had no idea their motives e-"

"My motive was to kill this bastard."

Attention quickly shifted from the Deathwatch leader towards you, quiet shock filling the room at your bold and crude words. There was a small part of you that loved the drama and attention, but you couldn't get cocky and stupid when you were at their mercy. Trying to mask the amount of pain you were in, you stood and stared at Maul, lip curled into a disgusted scowl. "I will kill you."

After a brief silence, Maul chuckled, seemingly amused. I sprinted towards Maul, not even my injuries could stop me. Out of nowhere, I was grabbed by the throat by a larger man whose tattoos resembled Maul's. I could feel his grip tighten dangerously around my neck, nearly crushing my throat. Shit, I really didn't think this through.

"You fool, you thought you could charge at me? A Sith Lord?" Maul's voice sounded cold and venomous, his anger quiet. I could feel myself internally shrink, but I couldn't back down, I'd gotten too far to stop now. Gasping for breath, I mustered up the most piercing glare I could, staring daggers at the cocky Zabrak.

"You're too weak to be a Sith Lord." I choked out.

If Maul hadn't been angry before, now he was absolutely seething. How dare a lowly soldier like you call him weak. He grew angrier when the voice in the back of his head agreed with you, reminding him how easily he had been discarded by his master.

"You know NOTHING!" Maul growled. Savage suddenly released his grip on your neck, but the relief was brief. A stronger force closed in around your neck, constricting your breathing even more than before. You were dragged forward towards Maul, before being violently thrown at his feet. Coughing and sputtering for air, you grabbed at your neck, massaging the sides gently in an attempt to ease the pain. Maul scoffed and stood, kicking you over onto your side. "Am I still weak?" He spat, placing his foot on your waist, lightly grinding his heel into the flesh. Your body moved limply with each twist on his foot, but you still maintained a burning glare towards Maul.

A deeper, more primal part of him enjoyed the glare y/n gave him, relishing in the uneven power balance and predator/prey dynamic. The brat had guts, stupid as they may be, he'll give them that much. I'll keep them around, I want… more. He thought, But I can't let anyone else get any of these stupid ideas. Maul added more pressure on y/n's waist, unclipping his saber from his belt and igniting it in one fluid motion. He furrowed his brow, glaring at everyone in the room.

"Let it be known, from here on out, who exactly your rightful ruler is." His strong voice echoed throughout the room. "If any of you ATTEMPT to betray me, you will die, slowly and painfully." He looked down at y/n for a moment, then simply kicked them away from him, turning his back towards them. "Take them to the prison. I still have… some use for them."

You opened your eyes a bit to see a few Deathwatch soldiers hurry forward to retrieve you, picking you up and pushing you forward roughly. Your body wouldn't cooperate with you, so you stumbled forward and fell once again. Fuck, what is going on with me? You thought as one of the soldiers picked you up, carrying you out of the room and to the prison. Why am I going to prison? He just said he'd kill anyone who tries to betray him. What use do I have?

————

I sat in the cell, holding my head in hands, staring blankly at my lap. "Did I really think I could take on Maul? Me, of all people? Yeah, right." I snorted bitterly. "He always said I was delusional..." My words petered out, intense guilt creeping into my head. He couldn't have gotten in trouble too, right? I didn't involve him, I haven't even spoken to him in weeks. 

I hear heavy footsteps coming towards my cell but it's not metallic. I see the large zarbark man who held me at my throat. He gave me a glare and a snarl before he turned his back to me and stood at place. I weakly got up and limped to the man. “Who are you? I know you’re connected to Maul but why are you at his side?” I asked the large man. He seemed to notice the question but he didn’t answer. “Hellooo? Did you hear me or are you so stupid to even say-” I was interrupted by a yell he made as he turned around to face me. ‘You're lucky to be even alive. He would just murder you right there.” I was taken away by how deep his voice was, it was frightening “Maul wants you for some reason, he never shows mercy” he continued. “Then why am I still alive?” I asked. “I don’t know, he didn’t tell me but all I know if you’re still alive, you’re important to him.”

I turned and sat back down, biting my thumb. He doesn't even know me, what could he want? I looked back at the man, he looked as pissed off and confused as I felt. "What's your name?" I asked, but I didn't really expect any answer this time. "And just who are you and Maul? Why did you come here?"

"Savage Opress." His response was curt and cold, he didn't appreciate being questioned. "You'll probably be released in a few days, but if it were up to me, you would have been dead by now. Or you'd rot in here like trash."

“I think you’re just being held back, Savage. You’re much bigger and stronger than Maul, such a foolish act taking orders from a skinny, feeble man”. Savage let out a roaring yell, similar to a creature, his eyes suddenly filled with rage and anger and slamming his fist into the glass wall leaving a crack on it. “I can either come in there and massacre you, or you shut up and don’t say a fucking word.” Savage shouted. 

I swallowed nervously, sparing at glance at the cracked glass. I shouldn't antagonize him. "Listen, Savage, I'm sorry." I stared directly at him, trying my best to not look away in discomfort. "I won't say anything rude anymore." Against my better judgment, I slowly stood up and walked over to the glass, standing a few inches away from him. I either have the biggest balls in the universe or I'm fucking stupid. "But you are a pretty scary dude, you did almost choke me to death." I continued, trying to keep a calm but pointed tone. Savage seemed to calm down for a bit. “You’re right. Still, shut up, mandalorian.” Savage turned around and went back into position. He folded his arms and looked around if anyone saw what just happened. 

————

It had been some days since my last interaction with Savage, though he stood outside of my cell almost daily. Today, however, he was nowhere to be seen. I found myself trying to look down the hall, without much success, to see if I could spot him. It feels kind of lonely without him, even though he doesn't talk to me. Just as I sat down once more, I heard footsteps approaching my cell. More than one person? I thought, taken a bit by surprise. Savage came into view, and I almost smiled at the familiar face before I saw who the other person was. “Y/n, you absolute fool. You know there’s a fine line between being brave and stupid, right?” My lord and savior is my childhood friend Jackorr. We haven’t talked to each other in weeks, due to a fight we had discussing something REALLY personal. “I didn’t need your help Jackorr, seriously I had it way under control.” I lied. “Oh really? After the stunt you pulled towards the Maul, you’re incredibly lucky. Weren’t you there when he killed Pre-Vizsla?” Jakorr explained. 

Any feelings of possible guilt I had were now quickly stuffed into the back of my head because of his smartass remarks. "So what? I'm stronger than you know." I replied coolly. "It's not like you were ever there to help me." I muttered under my breath. I stood up and tread over to the glass. "So what's going on now? Why are you two here?" I asked, hoping Savage would answer my question instead of Jackorr. "Am I being released?" I quipped, half joking and half hopeful. “Maul told me to release you, but with careful watch by him and this other mandalorian. Savage replied. He turned around and walked towards the keypad to unlock the glassdoor to my cell. I walked out with a slight limp, I was still weak from the failed single-person coup but I decided to hide my pain and walk towards the exit. “I’ll be taking care of y/n now, thank you kind sir!”. I noticed Savage give a small chuckle to Jackorr’s thank you. It’s the most personality I've seen come out of the big oaf. Me and Jackorr walked on the catwalk together, but by the force this is awkward. Jackorr and maul watching me like I’m some sort of little kid. “You know, I kinda miss talking to you, y/ n. You’ve been on my mind recently. B-because of your failed revolution.” Jackorr nervously said.  
My eyes narrowed, knowing exactly where this was going. I didn't know how to respond without getting pissed off or uncomfortable, or if I even wanted to say something. I sighed, purposefully avoiding eye contact or even looking in Jackorr's direction. "We shouldn't talk about this." I answered simply, although I had a lot to say. I didn't have the energy for another possible argument, especially if I was going to be under watch by him. And Maul as well, the quiet patronizing voice in my head reminded me gleefully. I shook my head, turning to Jackorr again. "I've known you for years, I know when you're bullshitting me. But we already cleared everything up, there's nothing more to say about that." “Listen y/n, I’m not trying to argue again but I would like to talk about it again you know?” Jackorr fixes his stupid brown hair like the liar he is. It’s the same shit he says but in different words. “Please Jackorr, I literally just came out of prison. Can we please talk about this some other time?” I pleaded. “ Oh, alright then. Another time then” Jackorr said with fake confidence. I wish we could stop talking about this. It’s been years since we- well ‘gotten together’. We’re childhood friends, met by the same crime syndicate we were forced back in our home world Corellia, I just wish we just remained as friends. I just feel guilty each time we argue because it’s my fault he’s like this, I think. 

————————

We spent some time in silence afterwards, mainly stealing glances at one another and quickly looking away when our eyes met. I think he was supposed to be giving me a tour of the place or something, but it was more like pointless meandering. I cleared my throat, keeping my eyes focused ahead. "So, this Maul guy, the new 'ruler', do you know what he's like? I know he's a cunt and all, but have you personally met him?" I asked Jackorr, trying to restart a conversation without bringing up the tricky subject. “I haven’t met him but by the stories of the others, he is a sith lord.” Jackorr replied. “I know that he’s some warrior of a religion long gone but the man, Jackorr. How is he?” “No I can’t say, all I can say is that he just sits there on the throne with the other zabrak. 

Me and Jackorr remained quiet for the rest of the walk. We eventually came outside to see the outside. I haven’t felt fresh air since forever. I take a long deep breath, feeling my lungs fill with air and let it out. Even if the city is in a dome, it feels way better than being stuck in that prison. I smiled a bit to myself, looking around at the scenery I felt I had long forgotten. Letting out a sigh of relief and contentment, I noticed Jackorr staring at me intensely.

"What is it? Why are you staring at me like some creep?" I asked, turning towards him and crossing my arms behind my head. He blinked and shook his head a bit, looking away.

"Nothing, I just missed seeing you look happy. I haven't seen that expression on your face since we were together." Jackorr responded. I frowned, realizing he wasn't going to stop. I was hardly ever happy with you, but you wouldn't know that, would you? I thought.

"Don't start, Jackorr." My words came out cold and stiff. "Stop bringing it up when I obviously don't want to talk about it." I quietly sighed, putting my arms down when Jackorr grabbed my wrist. He looked at me, and I could see the desperation in his eyes.

"Please y/n, my feelings will never change. You know I love you, are you going to tell me that you don't feel the same? That my feelings mean nothing?" Jackorr pleaded, grip tightening around my wrist with each question. "You can't possibly be that selfish, could you? Do you just want to hurt me?"

I winced, my wrist starting to hurt. Definitely gonna bruise, but that's not new. I thought. The familiar feeling of guilt had begun to creep up on me, its arms snaking around my body. "I do care about you, but please, I can't keep doing this with you."

"How do you think I feel?" He asked, his voice almost a hiss. "Every time I see you and I can't be with you, I want to die. If you really cared about me, you would stay." Jackorr's grip eased on my wrist, and he looked down at it. "I didn't mean to hurt you, y/n, you know I would never hurt you on purpose." He whispered, rubbing the bruising skin gently.

I couldn't do anything except watch him and listen to him talk. Anything I said would be turned against me, and I'd be the villain. I'm always the bad one, no matter what I do. I yanked my arm away, looking at Jackorr with a mix of disbelief and frustration. “Can you just shut the fuck up? For once in your pathetic life can you just look for someone else to fuck you? There is literally a dome filled with women other than me.” I stood up and walked off away from this piece of shit man. I can hear him yelling for me and I just rather not listen to him right now. I’m tired of his lies and his stupid fucking manipultion. I’m not the bad guy in this situation, no matter how many times he talks about how “inconsiderate” I am for his feelings. I’m sorry that I can’t take care of you and your wittle baby feelings, you’re a fucking mandalorain, do better. 

I find myself near a ledge guarded by a metal fence. I lean towards it so I can rest after the whole ordeal. I hear the ambience of this dome city. It’s so peaceful, it's where I can feel ok for once, even if it's a little bit. I can actually think without Jackorr being in my face confessing his pathetic love to me. Is it better to be alone with my thoughts? No. Is it better than an idiot man? Yes. 

I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose, feeling a headache oncoming. Jackorr's a fuckin' parasite. I turn my head, observing the city and its people proceed as normal. No matter what happens, they always just keep going. It's always odd to think about, my world can easily come to an end while theirs cycles on. They'll keep going to the markets, to the houses of relatives, to rallies and wars, no matter how many people die. I shake my head, trying to clear the minor existential crisis, when a familiar figure approaches. Savage.I think, debating on greeting him. Against my better judgment, I raise a hand in greeting, smiling in his direction. He seems to acknowledge my wave but just looks at me angrily, as always. “I have to take you somewhere, mandalorian. My master demands it. “ says Savage. “Where does that monster want with me?” I say. “ I don’t know mandalorian, he wants me to take you to his personal area. Follow me and that is all I ask” Savage replies. Savage returns to walk back and turn his head. “Are you coming, or are you deaf?” I hesitantly walk towards Savage and follow him. I’m no jedi but I have a bad feeling about this. 

_________________________

I continued to follow Savage through the city. I wanted to ask a question to the buffalo but it felt so awkward to ask one. Each step he took felt like a small rumble. Savage seems like a himbo, all muscle and no brain. Maybe I’m wrong, he's partnered with maul.  
We eventually made it to an apartment complex. “What are we doing here? Isn’t he at the throne room?” I asked. “He wants you in this complex.” Savage replied. We entered the complex and walked up the stairs until we reached the third floor. “He is in here. I must go. He wants privacy” Savage told me. He nudged me a little when we returned to walk down the stairs. Hmph, himbo. I take my time before opening the door. I wonder all the possibilities about what was going to happen when I opened this door. Is he gonna kill me finally? Maybe. I take my hand and reluctantly twist the knob to open the door. I open the door and see Him. Standing and his hands behind his back, His red skin covered in his dathomir tattoos, his yellow eyes and his sharp horns. I sense fear within me, but I stand my ground. 

“So, what did you want from me, your Highness?” I quipped, trying to mask my fear with sharp tongued sass. His eyes narrow, keeping a sharp glare trained on me. I tried to not break the stare, but his gaze made me feel so small, like prey being stalked. “Well?” I spoke again, my mouth feeling dry. Something was going to happen, and soon.

“Y/n, is it? Yes, you caused quite the scene.” Maul said, his voice smooth and cold. “You did something only one other has done before.” He took a few steps forward, and I backed up against the door. “Your little challenge excited me.” He spoke dangerously low, now almost directly in front of me. My heart started to race, and he reached out, tilting my chin up a bit. He looked almost pleased with himself.

I turned my face away from Maul, side stepping and moving away from him. My head was a mess from what little he had done, and I had no idea why. A part of me wanted to turn back and tease him, while another wanted to find a way out, but Maul apparently had other plans. I felt my body stop, being squeezed like it had been when he had used the force to strangle me. Though I knew it was useless, I still tried to fight against and move.

“You still struggle, pet?” He almost purred, clearly enjoying my misery. Is this really miserable? He clearly wants you. The unwelcome voice in my head muttered. Maul walked over, releasing the force grip he had on me. He grabbed my arm, noticing the bruises beginning to form on my wrist. He let out a low growl, seemingly angry about the injury. “Who did this?”

I stared at him in disbelief. “It was an accident.” I murmured, though I didn’t know why I covered for Jackorr. It was like a whole new person had taken over my body, but they were still me. I raised my free hand, caressing Maul’s cheek. His skin was cool, weathered and lined from God knows how many years of living as a criminal. He seemed surprised at the action, his eyes widening briefly. I felt a strange ache in my chest and stomach when he looked at me, like I had been waiting for this to happen. “You never told me what you wanted, you know.” I said, my voice barely above a whisper, my throat feeling tight.

\-----------------------

Maul’s previous confidence seemingly wavered, and he hesitated to answer. His breath stuttered as Y/n brushed their thumb against his lips. The energy in the room shifted quickly, tension thick in the air as the two stared at each other, unmoving. Finally, Y/n made the first move, pressing themselves against Maul, letting out a faint whisper that sounded like the zabrak’s name. In response, he growled again, tilting Y/n’s chin upwards and kissing them hungrily, which they reciprocated. What Maul lacked in skill, he more than made up for in enthusiasm, pulling them closer to his chest. He wanted more of Y/n, he needed more. Pulling away from the kiss, he looked at Y/n seriously.

“Are you alright with this, pet?” He asked, searching his partner’s face desperately. They stared at him incredulously, almost offended that he asked that now.

“Are my actions not enough?” They asked, voice nearly dripping with desire. “Must I do more for you to really see me?” Y/n pushed Maul back towards the closest wall near them, sliding down to their knees, leaving randomly placed kisses as they went. Maul looked down at them, taking in their appearance. The skin he could see was flushed, their eyes clouded with lust, yet they still retained that fiery gleam that had caught his attention when he first saw them.

Oblivious to the long stare, Y/n continued their current objective of removing as much of Maul’s clothing as possible. Pulling off the belt(?) from around his waist, eager hands slid up his sides, under his tunic covering, feeling the scars littered across his torso. He suppressed a shiver at their touch, watching them as they moved. Y/n’s hands trailed down his torso, following the patterning of his tattoos, coming to rest near his hips. They trembled with anticipation, tugging down the waistband of Maul’s trousers. Then, the very thing they’d been yearning for springs free.

Strangely, they found his dick pretty, tattooed and different from human ones. The tattoos flowed smoothly along each ridge, blunted barbs running along the sides, and the base was thick. Y/n sighed in near delight and admiration as they slid their thumb across the head, prompting an appreciative hiss from the former sith. Looking up, their eyes met with the Dathomirian’s yellow ones, wordlessly communicating a shared sense of need and ardor. Gently but firmly taking hold of the shaft, Y/n licked their lips and took as much of Maul’s dick in their mouth as they could. Maul nearly crumpled from the stimulation, having long forgotten any other previous encounters he may have had with some nameless fling.

Y/n’s mouth was warm, desperately sucking and anxious to please, stroking what could not fit. Each jerk prompted a muffled moan from the proud Zabrak, his breath shallow and stuttered, not used to this state of arousal. His dick only seemed to grow the more aroused he became, proving even more difficult to fit inside Y/n’s mouth. The moans became harder to bite back, and Maul relented, letting quiet gasps and groans spill from his lips. His hand made its way onto Y/n’s head, but he was careful to not push their head down.

“Y/n...please…” Maul gasped, his proud and tough demeanor completely wrecked by the Mandalorian. They hummed, the sensation completely wracking the sith lord with pleasure, the tightness that had built up in his core threatening to snap. “Y/n, please..I cannot--” He pleads, his vulnerability uncharacteristically revealing itself. “I cannot hold on anymore--” He nearly chokes a sob, lost in the haze of sexual euphoria, lost in how their hands and mouth work him. He trembles, and he finally succumbs to his orgasm, his cum spilling into Y/n’s mouth.

Maul, the proud and cold ruler of Mandalore, the vengeful former sith, reduced into a shaking and breathless man bracing himself on a wall. Y/n swallows the slightly bitter semen, expressing a brief face of distaste before looking back up at the winded man. His brow bone is relaxed for once, his chest rising and falling, his skin covered in a thin film of sweat. He looks beautiful, Y/n thinks, and I made him this way.

The air still hung heavy with tension as Maul reclothed himself, Y/n watching how the fabric rippled with his every move. Now, the sith seemed more vulnerable, less angry and self important as he seemed at first. Y/n stood, putting a hand out to touch Maul’s cheek gently. He hesitates, as if wondering if he should pull away, before he takes their hand and noses it like a touch starved puppy. He lets out what sounds like a purr, kissing the palm of Y/n’s hand. He mumbles something in his native tongue before looking at Y/n.

“Stay.” He whispered, his voice barely audible to the Mandalorian. “With me. I don’t know what about you possesses me so, my beloved, but I fear to lose you.” Maul sounds terrified, anxious. Y/n froze at his words, a feeling of dread washing over their body.

“Maul, I- I should go.” Y/n muttered in response, removing their hand from the sith’s grip. “I’m sorry, but…” They trailed off, unwanted memories resurfacing. “I’m so sorry, Maul.” Their face went blank as they took a few slow steps back, turning and running towards and out of the apartment door.

Maul once again was left alone, standing in the empty apartment.


End file.
